If you asked me five years ago where I thought I would be now, I would guarantee my answer wouldn't be a stay-at-home mom living in Memphis. I had been in the pharmaceutical industry in Nebraska for ten years and it was all I knew, I had not ever really contemplated being married, and I certainly NEVER thought I would have kids of my own. But life never really goes as planned 100% of the time. I'll admit that I never thought much of stay-at-home moms. Not because I didn't know some fantastic ones, my cousin Amy is a prime example of wonder woman. She and others often made me feel inadequate because of the their organizational abilities in chaos, hospitality, and grace under pressure.
Growing up only one of my friends had a mom who didn't have a paying job. When I was working, I always heard my counterparts talk about how bored they would be if they stayed at home with their kids all day. I think there is some truth to that because cajoling a child to eat day in and day out will make you wish happy hour began at noon. However the dirty little secret is no matter how much one loves their child, it is wonderful to have a place to escape. I daydream of the sales meetings I used to dread going to because if your mind drifted, no one was in peril. You had hours of quiet and food that you didn't have to prepare. Now if I space out, I find my child three rooms away at the dog bowl. This is frustrating for many reasons, the main one is that she will eat dog food but the idea of baby food is ridiculous to her. She is super fast, strong, and has the most absurd crawl. Anyone who has ever witnessed her in action will attest "it just ain't right". She refuses to put her knees down at all and will only allow her right calf to touch the floor, she uses her left foot as a propeller. She is really close to walking, which I'm sure is only the beginning of the
2nd Circle of Mom Hell.
My ubiquitous blog confession is being at home with your child is a really hard job. For every post I read about these wonder women who have itineraries and crafts for every week, I have also read many from countless women who talk about be under-appreciated, exhausted, or miss having a clean house. Its a balance that I strive for every day, yet I am so far from it. I am not a motherly type, this post title is an actual quote from my uncle. Sure I'm smart, loyal, and driven, but those aren't traditional maternal qualities. I learned to cook after being laid off from my job. Thanks again to my cousin Amy who introduced me to Cook's Illustrated. I can do laundry like a pro but the no sleep, no vacation, and constant need for my tiny human to be within 100 yards of me at all times does take a toll.
Just like every job, this one has its perks. Nugget's first word was Mama, and she waves and babbles constantly. She has an elvish sense of cuteness and she is beyond curious and interested in every thing. Watching her play with her big brother and sister is really adorable. I have given up wanting a really clean house, it isn't going to happen. I am working on patience when I fall on a toy in the middle of the night, or kick a block through the room. Unlike any other job, there is no assigned trainer or grace period. You are thrown to the wolves and if you are lucky you have friends and family who help, give advice, and encourage you when you need it. I AM A LUCKY DOG because I have both.
